In May last year Emma Harris, CEO at Glow and Board Advisor at the Social Element was out for brunch in New York with the Social Element leadership team when the unthinkable happened. She suffered a cardiac arrest and her life changed forever. Whilst Harris doesn’t remember much of the event herself, her amazing colleagues sprang into action, three doctors in the restaurant jumped up to help. Two ambulances came within 7 minutes. 

“I was incredibly lucky to be with wonderful people that love me who quickly got me some help” Harris explains. “For a cardiac arrest that happens outside of hospital only 1 in 10 people survive it and out of those 1 in 10 get some form of brain damage. So I am here by the grace of god. I’m very lucky that gradually over the few days that followed they took all the machines away and I was absolutely fine.” 

It was an experience which was utterly life changing. As Harris explains: “I was in ICU for 8 days and came out into an apartment in New York. I waited for my fit to fly certificate then came home. It’s changed my life in terms of slowing down but apart from that I'm completely healthy,” she says, adding: “I'm someone who always looked after myself, who has a zest for life and as anyone who knows me will share, I go at everything all guns blazing.”

Yet, arguably in order to blaze so brightly, you equally need the time to recharge. Harris is articulate in sharing how the life-changing experience impacted her. She brands the incident as her ‘AC2L’ which stands for “another chance to live.” Now she wants others to learn from her experience and create a new way of working in which leadership that exhibits kindness and empathy is at the core.

#slowthefuckdown

If you are on Linkedin it’s likely that Emma’s story will be familiar to you, as from her hospital bed Emma posted about her experience on the platform alongside the hashtag #slowthefuckdown. The post amassed over 90,000 likes and reached 9M views, numbers that are unheard of for Linkedin. Such reach has likely been achieved because while Harris’ story is unique, burnout is increasingly universal. Despite the worst restrictions of lockdown being lifted, a Forbes survey in 2022 found that 53% of women had stress levels higher than they were a year ago.  

“I’ve always been a believer in social media not being just for the positive, I’ve talked previously about struggles I’ve been through. So in my infinite wisdom, I thought I’d share that I’m a mum of four running two businesses, a charity, I'm the rep at school,  on the PTA. Always the first with my hand up. Always want to help people and here I am, learn from me. You’re not alone, we are all working too hard.” says Harris.

People around the world have resonated with the post. At events and conferences, people recognise Harris and share that the post stopped them in their tracks. “I put the hashtag slow the fuck down and it all sort of turned into a bit of a movement,” she says.

Now, she hopes that the post and the widespread burnout it unveils will continue to raise awareness and shift the discourse. A powerful example of how one person’s story can so powerfully contribute to an ongoing industry-wide conversation around unsustainable ways of working. 

She explains: “Monday to Thursday I was absolutely hell for leather, day and night and squeezing in the life admin that comes with four kids and a life and a husband. It just gave me a chance to say OK what can we do differently? And ask how I can help other people do things differently too?” she adds.

Beating burnout

While the industry talks a good game on burnout, the uncomfortable truth remains that it does very little to support talent in the workplace and remove unnecessary societal pressures. “It feels like burnout is the endpoint but the bit you need to catch is before that, is the point before you get to the burnout. We need to recognise those signs,” says Harris.

For women in particular stereotypes and expectations can lead to the neglect of both their mental and physical health. “We still carry so much of the mental load at home, even if you have a fantastic partner and of course, there are exceptions to this such as same-sex partners, and single mums but like in my relationship I have a wonderful husband but I still carry the mental load.” continues Harris.

She says: “I was the one that was busy going crazy, leaving notes, leaving schedules on the fridge, fixing everyone, making sure everyone was doing the job and everything else. Just yesterday I took my kids swimming, I grabbed everything they needed but forgot my own swimming costume. It just shows we prioritise everyone else.” 

Outdated gender stereotyping places continued pressure on women and in turn is detrimental to men who are forced into opposite but equally damaging roles. Where women are still encouraged to take on the lion's share of the care responsibilities and are fed headlines around the notion of ‘having it all’, Harris urges them to consider where such pressures are coming from.

She points to the example of influencer Jay Shetty, who wrote a book called Think Like A Monk.  He says ‘I’m not who I think I am, I am not who you think I am, I’m who I think you think I am.’ And it's like we spend our lives making decisions based on a fear of what other people are going to think of us” she explains.

She continues: “I mentor a lot of really senior women who still suffer from imposter syndrome. One woman is afraid to go for a walk without her phone in case people think she's skiving. We need to learn to recognise when these thoughts and feelings should be listened to and when they're not helpful and learn to be as kind to yourself as you are to other people.”

A kinder workplace

To help breed an environment of kindness to help not only others but ourselves too, Harris is passionate about bringing the #slowthefuckdown matra to life in the workplace. She believes that only by creating a workplace culture that looks after its employees will creativity be able to flourish. Harris believes this goal is achieved through open leadership, making sure people know where to go and encouraging an open dialogue between colleagues. 

“The first thing is about leading by example, showing vulnerability and creating psychological safety,” says Harris. She continues: “Certainly, I grew up in a culture where having those conversations did not feel OK. Saying to my boss I had too much work on would feel shameful.”

A fact which means leaders need to be intentional in creating open environments. She explains: “Leadership needs to create an environment where people feel safe, and genuinely cared for and know what functional support an organisation is giving them for their mental and physical health. Encouraging people to have mammograms and prostate checks, and really pay attention to their bodies and minds. “

This kind of culture is created by a leadership team that is unafraid to be vulnerable and can be aided by making use of the internal communications channels which should be used to encourage two-way conversation rather than as a broadcast channel. 

Space for creativity 

Harris is conscious that for all that resonate with the #slowthefuckdown mantra, there will be people that resist. “I know that some might read it and go ‘but I don't wanna slow the fuck down, I want everyone to speed the fuck up!” she says. However, she believes that pace is vital to calling businesses. She explains: “There's so much evidence that shows that people who feel genuinely well cared for and looked after and are able to bring their whole selves to work are more productive, more loyal, more creative.” 

She points to the fact that often the best ideas come to us while out for a walk or in the shower, as rarely can one think of an amazing idea on the spot under pressures of time or money. “Creativity comes from having the space and the freedom to think,” she explains.

Now, Harris is a firm believer in making time in the diary for creativity, allowing a chance to stop for air and to think. She explains: “Now my diary has a whole day every week where I'm working but not in meetings, where I can write. I think, I can ideate, all that stuff and that feels really good. We have also started having no more than 50-minute meetings so that you at least get 10 mins to have a wee and grab a cup of tea.”

Post-pandemic there is an opportunity to reshape the workplace, and Harris warns that with the return to the office, we must not fall into bad habits. She says “I always share that story of a woman who was presenting at a conference. Pre-pandemic that would have been a flight out, a night in a hotel, a dinner, a 3 day job for a two-hour slot but post-pandemic she's got meeting either side and no time to catch her breath. So creating the space and freedom to be more creative is key.”

Harris believes that a new generation of leaders have an opportunity to make real change. She explains: “I remember being a bit snippy about it ‘who are all these purpose-led millennials?’ but they've got a bloody point.” With a better focus on mental health, well-being and purpose within work, talent is afforded the space to be happier and create more impactful work. 

She adds, “I feel like the sort of old guard of the ‘work hard play hard’ ethic will eventually die out as the people that are increasingly leading companies support a wellbeing culture that will create more productivity in the round. Plus hybrid working which I believe is the future post-pandemic.”

Leadership with love

Harris reflects on the changes that she’s experienced since coming home after her AC2L. She makes reference to the final scene of Love Actually, as cliche as it may sound, when faced with a life or death situation, love overwhelmingly is what prevails. 

Now, Harris is intentional about how she spends her precious time. She wants to “invest more time in helping people because the one thing I've learnt is that love and people are actually the only thing that matter.”

Being a little kinder, being with her colleagues that helped her through and being with her children and loved ones has seen Emma’s focus grow to spreading the #slowthefuckdown message. She adds: “I haven't read all 9,000 comments but when I do occasionally get 5 mins and read I got so much love from people all over the world. It gives me so much faith in human nature that when something like that happens people have got your back.”

This notion of kindness that we so often extend to others must now also be extended to ourselves. In learning to say no, allowing time to appreciate life and focusing on passion, the workplace can be a better place for all.